But the thing about it is, you have no proof of any of those happy things. And someone who has lived with depression and in chronic pain DOES have daily proof that things continue to be bad and can get worse. People make decisions based on the best information they have at the time, based on the evidence they have. No one else has any way to know another's pain level, and we don't have the right to dictate what they are able to tolerate. Maybe the last rock in the pocket wasn't enough to pull the person under, but this next rock is a doozy. And the burden of the weight is cumulative, though most of the time outsiders can only see the current rock and may interpret it as a pebble. (And anyone in the person's life is an outsider really, because no other person, no matter how intimate the relationship, is able to know everything another has been through or how the person interpreted and tolerated the events.)
You wouldn't be angry if your loved one had a crushing migraine and sought the relief of medication. Likewise, you can't be angry if someone was in so much emotional pain that they sought the relief of suicide. And their decision was not your fucking business.
It's pointless to be angry with the dead. They have already left the terminal no matter how they got on the plane.
And don't give me the argument that someone was "selfish" to leave you. If someone is suffering so badly that they chose to leave life, they were doing all they knew to do, given the circumstances. They building was burning, and they had no parachute. Did you want them to hang out another day and burn alive? If you wanted them to avoid relief because YOU still needed them around, then who indeed is the fucking selfish one?
Terminal. We are all terminal. We all have different flights at different times, and in this body , as this person, we only have one way tickets. A person may be at the airport already waiting and not even know it. A flight may be delayed for years. A flight may take off suddenly, but when it's time for your flight, only you know, and it's impossible to miss. At any other airport, if we knew a friend had a one way ticket, we wouldn't stand at the gate after they take off and be pissed that they can't come back. It'd be pointless. And so, here too, you can't be angry with the dead.